It has begun again...

It's snowbird season. Lots of people driving at rush hour that could just stay home one more hour. I have a feeling over the coming months, weeks, days I should have lots of good idiotic stories

When you're following a line of people going 5 under in your car and you finally see the leader and he's driving like a jack wagon and then you get close enough and realize he's the moron that sticks his registration stickers in all four corners. 

 xo Sharpie bumper

Gets in the "left" left turn lane because it's shorter but immediately needs to turn right, right in front of you

xo Proud army dad

Enough complaining. Please make this. Immediately. Cauliflower Mac n Cheese.

                     

It's here: http://selfproclaimedfoodie.com/hidden-cauliflower-macaroni-cheese/

I'm in a food coma and too lazy. I 3/4'd it because I've made the mistake of cooking for 8 before. But now I have leftover cauliflower for a snack!

It started out being healthy...but then it wasn't. I used 1% instead of half&half and sharp cheese, handful of Parmesan and white cheddar, and topped it with parsley/breadcrumbs under the broiler.

Trust me. It's time for me to go waste 3 hours watching the season premiere of the Bachelor

xo A

It's getting CHILI in Florida

But for real, we're talking low 70's, mid 60's people.

Today I donned a sweater and knew it was chili for supper. Raise your hand if you've been making the same chili recipe forever. As in you know the recipe by heart and don't need to look at the card anymore. *me*

So I asked around, looked up some recipes and made the most amazing supper. I almost don't want to write this, and instead get another bowl. But I will not, because it just remembered that the grocery store sells turkey necks (right next to the ground turkey) and it has scarred me a little.

Turkey chili

1 pound ground turkey

1/2 a yellow onion, chopped

1 green pepper, cut up pretty small

1 can diced tomatoes

2 15oz cans tomato sauce

1 can black beans

1 can chili beans/red beans

Chili powder

Salt and pepper

So I did this in the crockpot, but I did it pretty backwards. Naturally I didn't have 4 hours to let it cook so I'm going to tell you how I would have cooked it.

I browned the turkey with 1 teaspoon chili powder. I think it adds more flavor. When that was done, I sautéed the onions and peppers. Everything else went into the crockpot along with 2 tablespoons chili powder and 1/2 teaspoon of salt and pepper.

I let it cook for an hour while my CORNBREAD was baking. However I was starving and put it in the microwave for a minute and had to eat. If you have the time, 4 hours on high, 6 hours on low.

Ok but this was the best part. Creamed corn, cornbread.

Uh you heard me right. I've never had it before but the recipe I found said "Best Cornbread Ever" so I believed it, the internet doesn't lie. Or at least bloggers on Pinterest don't ;)

Preheat oven to 350 (this is the only time I preheat, when baking)

2 Jiffy cornbread mix

2 eggs

1 can cream style corn

2 teaspoons sugar

I halved it, what am I going to do with 16 muffins?! (I should not have halved it)(and I forgot the sugar, I don't really think it needed it anyway)

       

I like muffins, easier than bread, and they take less time to cook.

Baked 15 minutes + 2 for some color as muffins

If you don't half it and actually make it in a real pan, takes about 30-40 minutes

        

A beautiful golden brown

        

This is why I don't have a boyfriend. More leftovers for me.

        

xo A

ps. What do you put in your chili that makes it so amazing?

Cranberries

It's been awhile.

I've still been cooking, and doing projects, just have yet to post. These past few weeks have been tough and I just don't feel like writing.

However, today we are celebrating Friendsgiving and I am in charge of cranberries and potatoes (yes I signed myself up for these)

I found a recipe on Pintrest that was super easy for the cranberries (and also on the back of the bag)(lame) and it seemed very similar to what my mom uses.

1 cup water

1 cup sugar

Boil stirring CONSTANTLY

       

Wash these babies (1bag) and pour in once water is boiling. Bring back to a boil then lower heat to simmer.

Don't they look pretty :)

       

About the time I took the last picture. And thought "oh they look so pretty" These (swear word) things started popping, and yes they're hot, and yes they hurt. 

This is also when I added 10 cloves, some cinnamon and allspice. I also juiced 1/2 an orange. Cook on low for 12 minutes.

       

So you're basically done now. Except you have to dig out the cloves. The actual worst part about cranberries (hey mom, did you know cloves came ground up? I bet you don't even have to use whole cloves!) and a job my brother and I hated. It's like Where's Waldo, but Waldo is a sneaky biotch and moves.

However in the sake of being authentic, I used real cloves and am now hovering over this pot digging for cloves, but it smells so amazing. I would consider making these all the time so my apartment smelled this good. Can you find the clove?

(Bottom right)

       

If you've ever done this, there are about 3 stages.

1.) really confident, you've found 3 in a row and think "this year is going to be different!"

2.) you start debating if you ACTUALLY put 10 in...or perhaps it was only 9, that cranberry popped, and maybe you didn't actually throw #7 in....

3.) you start writing a sign to put in front of the bowl "Watch out for the missing Clove"

        

You take breaks. 

You call your mom.

And by some stroke of luck, YAHTZEE! You find the last one and it's over.

Cranberry making is truly an art form and not for the faint of heart. You've stained your favorite wooden spoon, and given up your entire morning, but for the sake of tradition, they're done and they taste pretty good. Now it's time for some football.

        

Thinking of you always,

xo A

Zucchini crust pizza

Yummy. Seriously, so yummy!

Spiralizer.

       

Chopped.

       

Dried.

       

Cheese and egg

       

Baked.

       

Toppings.

       

Ready to eat.

                                              

• For the crust:
• 2 small eggs
• About 3 small-medium zucchinis (my sizes were all over the place)
• 1.5 cups grated Parmesan or mozzarella. 
• Salt
• 
  
• For the toppings:
• Use anything you like on a pizza. 
• Tomato Sauce
• Mozzarella cheese 
• Assorted vegetables (I used can mushrooms, real fancy)
• Meat (I browned some turkey sausage)
• Olive oil, black pepper

I'm  told you can also use a grater for the zucchini...but why would you, when you have a sweet spiralizer?!

xo A

Elle Oh Elle

One of my friends posted this to Instagram, and I had to copy it because it made me laugh out loud. I had to modify it a little, but still.

Find something that makes you laugh out loud today :)

xo A

Getting "old"

Recently people have been saying "oh I feel so old" "I just can't do ______________ like I used to, I'm getting too old" "You're to old to do that"

That's just a really bad way to look at life I think. Yes of course you can't do things like you used to, because you GREW UP, and you are SMARTER now. [of course staying out til 2am drinking on a Thursday is bad, you have a JOB to go to at 8am, hello, use your head]

I'm not old, I just have a job now, that I very much like because it pays me.

However, last night as I was taking out my contacts, I saw a grey hair and promptly pulled it [I'm very glad I dyed my hair BEFORE my birthday or it might not have ended so well]. I've been noticing I've had to dye my hair more frequently as of late, and the only thing I worry about when I "get old" is how frequently I'm going to have to dye my hair.

If I dye my hair every 2 months [and that's pushing it] and spend 7.99 [let's make it $9 because of inflation and tax]

Yearly = $54 + 3 hours

Until I die [age 80 is what I'm 401K'ing for a target age] = $2,860 + 159 hours [or 6.5 days]

Ugh. I think that's more scary than anything. And probably by the time I retire, I'm not going to want to color my own hair! $$$ the price of being beautiful :)


xo
A

Baked Oatmeal

I've really been trying to eat a lot healthier lately. After doing the Advocare 24 Day Challenge, I kind of didn't stop. I've cut out processed food, sugar, fried things, and coffee [obviously on occasion I eat these things, but rarely. I've noticed I just don't feel great after I eat them] It's really easy to do during the week because I almost always have meals and snacks planned. On the weekend it's a lot harder because I'm at a movie or out to supper or at the bar and it's a little more difficult to eat better.

Anyway. 

I have been cooking new recipes I find on Pinterest and it's amazing. Until last night. When it all went very, very wrong.

I can't even tell you when I came to the realization that it wasn't going to turn out... Probably about the time I tried to mix milk, eggs and PEANUT BUTTER together. With a fork.  I knew it wasn't a good idea, and yet I kept going.

I would write more but it just depresses me. Ugh what a mess. Believe it or not peanut butter does not...melt when baked at high temperatures. I blame it on the natural pb...someone at work blamed it on the eggs.

       

It might look decent, but it has these awful pockets of gelatinous unsweetened oatmeal.

It's quite terrifying. And it's only missing so many because I scooped three pieces out to take to work for breakfast for the week.

This is quite literally what failure looks like. In an 8x8 pan sitting in my refrigerator right now. 

       

The absolute worst part about the whole thing.

It smelled AMAZING! So I'm sitting on my couch waiting for it to be done, and naturally take a bite right as it comes out of the oven so it's quite literally too hot to even tell if it's good or not... The second bite was spit into the sink.

I wasn't going to add this, but I actually wrote a comment on the woman's blog I got the recipe from, and probably sounded like a whiny brat (not really, but probably pretty whiny) everyone else had noooo problems, why did it turn out so bad for me?!

I hate baking.

xo A